Check continuity from your ecu (the hub of wires not the ecu itself) to your ignition coils to check for broken connections. This might be a year ahead of yours but a link to the fill wiring diagram
http://zilvia.net/f/showthread.php?t=650138
You are right about the ecu resetting itself, but I recommend checking for codes before you disconnect the harness. Try to start your car a couple of times. Take your ECU, turn the small dial on the side all the way to the right (diagnostics mode) , be sure to mark where it was initially. Do not start the car but put it in the on position (where you can hear the fuel pump prime) and read the red led. The first blinks are the first number of the code and will blink slowly, and a second series of blinks will be the second number ( for example a slow blink three times, followed by five fast blinks is the code 35 )