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Haha this thread makes me lol and cry at the same time.
Longest I did was a couple weeks in Va Beach back when I was in the Navy for motorcycle-related offenses... should have jumped the sidewalk and ran the fuckin cop over, but I stopped and tried the "oh, were your lights on? That helicopter was for me? Oh, there were 2 helicopters? What, you called in units from another city to get me? ... Uh, I didn't see you..."
Didnt work on the cops. Magistrate wasn't havin it either. Worst part was, I had to use two weeks of my saved up leave to not be counted UA (aka AWOL).
Anyway, it had to be the easiest time ever served, 'cause Va Beach Correctional was filled with a bunch of pussy kids (like 18yrs old and 110lbs) and old red necks that were serving time for weapons charges lol. Hit one loud mouthed, punk kid in the face one time (dude was yelling @ like midnight, right next to my bed), and didn't talk to a single person the rest of the time - just read a book a day, took a shower and a shit every other day like clockwork, and promised myself that I'd never get caught running again =P
Oh, and what the fuck is with everyone in County sucking so bad at basketball? It's all they talk about all week, then we get out there and no one makes a basket the whole 30mins, I swear. Laughed for hours about that at the time.
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